In Every Gutter
Photo by Maxim Hopman on Unsplash
God loves you. God loves you. God loves you.
God loves you intimately, ardently, completely, unconditionally.
God loves you faithfully, expansively, eternally and freely.
God loves you and seeks you in every gutter you find yourself. God seeks you in grief, fear, isolation, loss, persecution, poverty. God seeks you in wasted years, disappointment and unrealized dreams. God seeks you in illness, broken relationships, depression, failing marriages, addiction, anxiety and anger.
Nothing will stop God. God’s is a relentless pursuit.
Just like in the garden (Genesis 3), we hide, but God is always seeking. In fact, God is already there with us. God knows where we are (who we are). God is patiently and eagerly awaiting when we will allow ourselves to be found.
Jesus thirsted on the cross (John 19:28). Fully human and fully God, he became the brokenness and separation from God we all endure throughout our lives. He became our pain. He bore it not to vanquish some un-named “evil” - he bore it because he loved you so much he’d rather become it, die to it, than live without you.
Sin wasn’t on his mind, you were. He thirsted for you.
His thirst was unrequited love- separation from God and us. Every day we’ve refused him, ignored him. Every time pride lies “He can’t really love me” or “I’m ok. I don't need Him.” Every time shame and guilt tells us we’re not worthy.
God longs for you. Right now. Wherever you are, whatever you’re doing. Whatever you’re battling, you are the one on God’s mind. You are the one who has captured God’s heart.
When you turn to God- when you swallow hard and dare to meet God’s gaze- you will find only Love. Warm, kind, gentle, tender love. You will find only grace, mercy and forgiveness. You will find healing. You will find hope, strength and lasting joy. You will find that you were known all along, even in your hiding. You will find peace, creativity, and homecoming.
Henri Nouwen wrote: “Once we have come to the deep inner knowledge- a knowledge more of heart than of mind- that we are born out of love and will die into love, that this love is our true Father and Mother, then all forms of evil, illness, and death lose their final power over us.”
We need not wait to return to Love. It is available all the time- ready and waiting for you just as you are.
Close your eyes. Lift your spirit’s gaze to meet God’s. Will you allow yourself to be found?
Oh, that you would dare…
